I want to reconnect with people...


Can I even find time to get off from work?

Ash Wednesday today people, which means Lent is here.

And for that reason, I choose to deprive myself of the following:

1. Starbucks
2. Dessert

I'm not confident I'd be able to pull this off but then again, it wouldn't hurt to try. And besides, better those 2 than the one vice I can't live without.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Hmmm. Watch Chris Brown and Rihanna's concert.

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
All save for 1, which is to open a savings account haha

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Hmmm, yeah. A few UP friends here and there.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Sadly, yes...

5. What countries did you visit?
None.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A new adventure :)

7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
June 8, 2008 >> First promotion :)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finally bouncing back to life..

9. What was your biggest failure?
None so far...

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
None

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Crocs! haha

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. Of course. :p

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Mine as well.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Starbucks + Yosi + Cab fare + Food

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Christmas :)

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
No Air - Jordin Sparks feat Chris Brown

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?
Happier :)

ii. thinner or fatter?
Definitely thinner :)

iii. richer or poorer?
Richer, I was unemployed this time last year

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Sports, save money, blog, listen to music..

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Overspend, smoke, being mean

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Spent Christmas '08 at work and then home alone. Sad noh?

21. What was your favorite month of 2008?
June onwards :)

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Nope.

23. How many one-night stands?
:p

24. What was your favorite TV program?
This year, American Idol and Jeopardy

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Nope.

26. What was the best book you read?
Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami and Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
None much..

28. What did you want and get?
A promotion :)

29. What did you want and not get?
A savings account... a new phone

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Wala

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Went to Bubba Gump with ciggies :)

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A love life :)

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Business casual and/or sporty

34. What kept you sane?
My friends

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Wala

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Wala rin

37. Who did you miss?
Cris, Migo and Beia, Missy, Coach Jouel...

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Kim :)

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Strike while the iron is hot.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"All I want is the wind in my hair
To face the fear, but not feel scared"

Every person has his or her own standards. If you don't agree to what my standards are, please don't tell me to change it, especially if your standards are way lower than mine.

I'm not here to say that I'm better than anyone else. I'm just saying that mine are different from yours. If yours doesn't work for me, then leave me be. I'm not going to change just because you don't measure up. I guess that's the reason why you're against high standards. It is because you can't seem to meet anyone's standards. I could understand why you're so bitter about it. In that sense, I pity you.

Instructions: Think back to your first semester in college. Let's see how much you remember and how much you regret.


What section were you?
Block D2

Who were your seatmates?
Math 17 - Kristel
Philo 1 - Nica
Eng 10 - Melai biyahera and Mela _yvaine
Soc Sci 2 - I forget, I was barely in class
Nat Sci 1 - I forget, I was barely in class also

Still remember your English teacher?
yes
Eng 10 - Prof. Flores

What was your first class?

PE 2 Volleyball 7am TF
Math 17 8:30am MTThF

Best friends?
Hmm... can't say...

How was your class schedule?
It was all good.. I have breaks in between almost each class...

Made any enemies?
With my personality, how can I not have enemies?

Who was your favorite teacher/s?
Math 17 Prof. George Ongkeko Jr... Haha! I (used to) love Math...

Sport?
Volleyball (training team na, PE pa.)

Back then, do you always buy your lunch?
Yeah... so many places to eat in

Were you a party animal?
I guess

Were you well known in your school?
I'm friendly... could happen

Did you get suspended/expelled?
Suspended? No.. Do we have this in UP?
Expelled? Not on my first year.

Can you sing the alma mater?
Nope.

What was your favorite subject?
Math 17, PE 2 Volleyball

What was your school's full name?
University of the Philippines

Where did you go most often during breaks?
Katipunan, PHAn, PUGAD tambayan, AS steps

What color of pen do you always use?
Black

Recited often?
When I was in class

Ever cheated?
I don't remember cheating... First sem was too easy

Do you bring your own paper and pen?
Yeah

Are you in the top ten of your class/es?
I dunno... In Math and PE probably.. Haha!

Favorite things to do in class?
Smoke! (Yes, naabutan ko pa yung pwede magyosi sa loob ng classroom)

Classmates you didn't like?
Uh.. I forget their names hahaha!

Subjects with highest grade?
PE duh

Lowest?
Nat Sci 1 (pumapasok lang pag may exam)

Ever had a crush? Who?
Duh! wag na.. dami e

What's your theme song for him/her?
Ah well..

Which of your classes was he/she in?
not in the same class << ditto

Fave events in 1st sem?
vball games! << pwede na rin

What are your favorite classrooms?
Philo 1, I can smoke in the classroom

Do you sleep in class?
Math 17 - sa harap pa, huli

Ever thought of burning your school?
nope

Ever messed with a prof?
In my first sem? Nope

What do you miss most in your 1st sem?
I dunno

If you could go back in time and do it all over, would you?
I probably would

Favorite PE?
In college? Tenpin Bowling!

Where do you spot the hot girls in your school?
Don't know, don't care.

Ever gone on a field trip?
nope

Org?
First sem: UP Men's Vball Training Team
Not in my first sem.. UP JMA, UP PUGAD Sayk

Dorm, boarding house or your home?
Home

If you had your way, what was your dream course/major?
Hmmm... BA Psych? can't really say..

First ever person you knew?
Toni Reyes

First play you ever watched?
Oh shoot! I forget...

Ever been recruited by a frat or sorority?
Haha yeah! lonsi and apo

Is it fun in your school?
Of course

Ever gone rallying?
Too cut class, of course

Did you ever dream of having latin honors for your first sem?
Hell no

If you weren't studying in your present school now, where would you go?
Ateneo for sure

What do you remember most about 1st sem?
Varsity training... I miss

Actually, work itself's not bad. I mean, sure I have things to do and deadlines to meet, but it's all good. I can handle it, regardless how much sleep I get or lack thereof.

What burns me out are the extra things that I have to do for work that's not directly work-related. Gets?

For one, the whole sportsfest thing is supposed to be fun, right? Well, not if you're the assigned person to coordinate with a whole lot of people you barely know. What sucks even more is that I was assigned this task because I'm the only athlete there is in our account and they only gave me like what? 2 weeks to find available courts to schedule practices and form a team. And then there's the jerseys on top of all that... You don't even want me to start with this one. Argh.

This weekend, we had our first volleyball tryout/practice and out of the 30-something people who signed up, only 10 people showed up, including myself, most of them an hour or so late. The first game's going to be on Sunday, September 14th. I'm not expecting any wins for the next few weeks. Crapola.

Oh, before I forget, there'll be a Scavenger Hunt that I'm in no way planning to join but then my boss just signed me up because 1) the race will be in UP, and since I'm from UP, do the math AND 2) again, I'm the only athlete in the account. Dammit.

I hate this...

On top of that pa, there's a baby project to be launched tonight and I'm part of the preparations. They want me to have 30 flags to be ready by 7pm and they gave me this task just Friday night. Hmmmmmm.. and I haven't started yet. Hmmmm... good luck.

I want to cry. I was close to tears Saturday morning... I swear.

*Sigh*

It's silly-weird that whenever I lose my phone, it keeps on coming back.

Yeah, the nice ol' cab driver returned my phone. I just wish he didn't tinker with it and deleted old messages. Oh well. Either way, I'm glad my phone's back. No need to gather everyone's numbers all over again.

I lost my phone... sort of... I left it in a cab.

I didn't even realize I didn't have it for almost 2 hours. Saya. :|

Thanks tom3logz for calling my phone. Luckily, the driver answered. It seems I can still recover my phone.

Oi, kahit laspag na yung phone ko, love ko yun. :( May mga bagay lang talaga sa mundo na mahirap i-let go.

I'm sleepless lately...

~humdeedum

I miss my emo self

Hello, world.

Taking a break from work.

That's it.

I wish I could get out more...

I was the awfully bitter one.

Well, I still am to some degree... but I never thought that some people can still keep on biting each others' asses after n number of years just to make a claim as to who comes off as the victim at the end of all this, if there is an end to it all, that is. I'm trying not to sound self-righteous or whatnot, but to be frank, it's getting old. Just admit that it's over and MOVE ON! (Ok, that was a bit harsh, but I like to believe that I'm not the only one who feels this way.)

Anyway, I don't think whatever I write or say will ever make these certain people stop, let alone change how they feel about their issue. I guess what I'm trying to do is to voice out what I want to say without having to take full responsibility by putting on a shroud of anonymity on this post.

Oh well, I'm just saying...

:p

DVD marathons. That's what I do now to relax. I guess it's one of the reasons why I don't go online daily anymore. Anyway, here are some I've watched.

House MD (Seasons 1-3, 4: 12 episodes)
Brothers and Sisters (Seasons 1, 2: 12 episodes)
Commander In Chief (Complete Season)
The Black Donnellys (Complete Season)
Samantha Who?

Here's what I'm watching: Six Feet Under

DVD Wishlist:
Ally Mcbeal
Weeds
Scrubs
Big Love
Men In Trees

* Pick 15 of your favorite movies.
* Go to imdb and find a quote for each movie.
* Post them here for everyone to guess.
* Strike it out when someone guesses correctly, and put who guessed it FIRST and the movie.
* No googling/using IMDB search functions.

1. Right. Thanks. What if, uh, Mr. Thacker realized that he had been a daft prick and got down on his knees and begged you to reconsider if you would... indeed... reconsider.

2. I told you I was a good dancer. Can I keep you?

3. Mad, your grace, for not seeing this: you have a fortune, a beautiful woman who loves you. Take the gold, take the woman, and live your life! Stop this plan, take what you have won!

4. Let me know when your whole life goes up in smoke. Means it's time for a promotion.

5. I'd be the worst possible Godfather. I'd probably drop her on her head at her christening. I'd forget all her birthdays until she was 18. Then I'd take her out and get her drunk. And, let's face it, quite possibly try and shag her.

6. I have introduced myself. You have introduced yourself. This is a very good conversation.

7. Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived.

8. It's amazing the clarity that comes with psychotic jealousy.

9. Hello, Jason. I think I've had a change of heart. Quite literally. The animal-plant toxins had a rather unique effect on me. They replaced my blood with aloe, my skin with chlorophyll, and filled my lips... with venom.

10. You know, that seat belt thing was a pretty smooth move.

11. Things don't have to be extraordinary to be beautiful, Even the ordinary can be beautiful.

12. The great thing about MJ is... when you look in her eyes and she's looking back in yours... everything... feels... not quite normal. Because you feel stronger and weaker at the same time. You feel excited and at the same time, terrified. The truth is... you don't know what you feel except you know what kind of man you want to be. It's as if you've reached the unreachable and you weren't ready for it.

13. How about a little piece of integrity in this world that is so full of greed and a lack of honorability that I don't know what to tell my son! Except, "Here. Have a look at this guy who's busy yelling 'Show me the money." Did you know he's broke? Broke, broke, broke. He is broke and working for you for free! I'm sorry I'm just not as good at the insults as she is.

14. You know, I never wanted to be a mom. Sharing it with you... that's one thing. It's another to be looking over my shoulder for the next twenty years, knowing someone else would have done it better... someone else would have done it right.

15. I know you're Peter's best friend and I know you've never particularly warmed to me. Look, don't-don't argue. We've never got friendly. But I just wanted to say, I hope that can change. I'm nice. I really am. Apart from my terrible taste in pie and... It would be great if we could be friends.

You suck. :'(

He was an excellent coach, a great friend and a loving "father" to me and to my teammates. We were the lucky ones.

I love you, Coaches. We will meet again someday.

Browsing through a lot of photo albums of my friends having fun over the Holy Week sort of made me realize what my job is to me aside from it being a source of income and an alternative for self-improvement.

Me working has become a sanctuary, an escape.

At work, emotions do not exist. Relationships are never something more than being colleagues. And the best thing is I can take a break from all the relationships, which I voluntarily molded with a chosen few. What can I say, everyone needs a break from it all sometimes...

The downside is not being there usually leads to one thing... Growing apart.

Remember my last post about absences and relationships like the wind and a flame? I guess, some flames aren't as strong as one would think they'd be.

*Sigh*

Maybe I miss them... Although this can be more true than false, the repressed cynical me is saying they don't miss or need me anymore. After all, I haven't been there for them for the past few months. Of course, how can you turn to someone who's not there when you need them?




...

I guess I need my job like that. I mean, I have to stop worrying about other people for now. Self-improvement now, relationship-mending later (if it can still be mended that is).

*Sigh*



Later days.

What more can I say? I pretty much have the whole house to myself for the remainder of the Holy Week. :p

"Absence does to a relationship what the wind does to a flame. It extinguishes the weak and feeds the strong."

Or something like that. It's one of those forwarded text messages you randomly get from people that sticks. At least, for me it did.

Anyway, I forgot why I posted this entry to start with. I guess I better get some shut-eye. Later days.